Power is Choice: Interview with Author Gail Rudolph
I recently went one on one with Gail Rudolph. Gail is the author of the new book, Power Up, Power Down: How to Reclaim Control and Make Every Situation a Win/Win.
Adam: Thanks again for taking the time to share your advice. First things first, though, I am sure readers would love to learn more about you. How did you get here? What experiences, failures, setbacks, or challenges have been most instrumental to your growth?
Gail: As a young woman starting out in the workforce, I was clueless. I'd accepted a position at a community foundation where I was the only full-time employee and my boss, who was gone more often than he was in the office, was part-time. I did the majority of the work while he took the majority of the credit.
I worked hard and completed goals that should've taken three years in a little over one year.
So, I thought it was the perfect time to ask for a raise.
To this day, I remember my boss shaking his head and saying, "You get child support, don't you?"
I was shocked. I didn't know how to respond or what to do. I tried asking what child support had to do with my accomplishments for the foundation, but that didn't change his mind.
Then I discovered that the foundation board approved a salary increase - for my boss. I felt utterly devalued, frustrated, and powerless.
Finally, I resigned and moved on. But I learned that I had been unknowingly giving my power away.
The trouble was, even in subsequent roles, I still didn't have a grasp of how to claim my power and use it effectively.
As a young, ambitious woman in the workplace, I wasn't always aware of power dynamics, and I didn't always use power properly. Power wasn't something I thought I had at my disposal,
especially early on. Looking back, I now know I made many mistakes trying to navigate my role with power and figure out where I fell on the power continuum. But I began my journey to become aware of, and begin to understand, power.
Ultimately after years of struggling, I realized that the proper use of power can be learned. Once I mastered it myself, I set out to help others do the same. My upcoming book, Power Up, Power Down: How to Reclaim Control and Make Every Situation a Win/Win was written to pay it forward, sharing what I learned with others.
Adam: What do you hope readers take away from your new book?
Gail: My intention is for people to feel empowered after reading the book because they know they can start living a more powerful life immediately. Readers can become Power-Full, ethical people with enhanced relationships by understanding, learning, and implementing the lessons.
Realizing that power is not reserved for only those with important titles and celebrity status, we can change our outcomes. Power is the energy that ebbs and constantly flows in every interaction we encounter. If you know how to read a situation, you can step into and access power dynamics effectively to create mutually beneficial outcomes for everyone involved.
Power is part of every relationship. It is an intentional choice. We choose to use it effectively, or we (un)intentionally decide to surrender our power to others.
Adam: What should leaders understand about power dynamics?
Gail: Typically, when we hear the words "power dynamics," we think of someone "in power" and a group of those without it.
The truth is, everyone has power: Not just the people at the top, the ones with seniority, or who are the loudest.
Power is defined simply as "the capacity or ability to direct or influence the behavior of others or the course of events."
It's that mysterious energy that ebbs and flows as we interact with others. We can embrace it by making a conscious choice to either power Up or Power Down. Think of these two types of power like a peacock. Powering Up is when the bird displays its impressive tail feathers to step into a fuller power presence. Powering Down is when the peacock folds its train, making an intentional choice to retract and disarm.
The biggest misconception about power is that leaders always need to have the upper hand and exert control. Real power is when you calmly hold your power while allowing others also to retain theirs. Balancing the two sides of the power coin harnesses the energy that makes people use their true power effectively.
Adam: What are your most applicable tips on the topic?
Gail: Staying grounded in power means responding, not reacting. Our ability to use thoughtful intention is at the heart of harnessing the power we possess.
Real power works by energizing us from a place of stability and self-worth, not by demanding control.
Assessing every situation helps us understand where we fall on the power spectrum. Just like in a movie or TV show, not everyone can be the lead actor or actress. But, if it weren't for the supporting actors, the plot wouldn't advance. Working as a team, they each possess their individual power.
Once we know our place on the spectrum given that unique interaction, we can choose the most effective power tools. This might entail what I call Powering Up, which uses verbal and nonverbal cues to announce our power. Powering Up is like a peacock showing its full plumage or a bear standing on its back legs and making itself bigger.
Or the situation may call for a more muted response by Powering Down. Powering Down is an intentional use of power to disarm and defuse a situation; both equally wield influence.
Most of us have a default: we either power Up or Power Down. But having a full deck of power cards to use gets much better results because not every situation calls for us to only step into that same power position.
For example, my sister was a nurse on the Alzheimer's unit. Time and again, she observed people trying to get the residents to do something by demanding it. When they attempted to control them or raised their voices, she would see the patients hunker down and become unmovable. One resident would sit down on the floor right where they were and refuse to move. Why? Because when your use of power is trying to remove someone else's personal power, the outcome is never good. We don't think about how unethical and ineffective it is to rob someone of their empowerment.
So, what do you do in this situation? Seek understanding with genuine curiosity, and adjust your body language to diminish the power struggle. My sister did this by sitting down next to the Alzheimer's patient and lowering her tone of voice. It worked every time.
Adam: In your experience, what are the defining qualities of an effective leader?
Gail: As John Maxwell says, leadership is influence, nothing more, nothing else. As leaders, we must advance a team while at the same time helping each member reach their highest potential. Not an easy task. However, empowering others is the only way to reach new levels of success.
Every leader I know will tell you that the most frustrating and time-consuming part of their job revolves around HR issues. Many of those issues revolve around imbalanced power dynamics caused by leadership or teams.
An effective leader addresses any inequality in power and ethically uses the tools of Powering Up and Powering Down as appropriate. This is the only way to create a genuinely inclusive and productive team. And let's face it, your people are a direct link to the bottom line.
Adam: How can leaders and aspiring leaders take their leadership skills to the next level?
Gail: Through understanding and responding effectively to interpersonal power dynamics
To survive in today's environment, leaders must know how to handle power differences effectively. Power is at play in every situation, and as leaders, we must possess the ability to create mutually beneficial outcomes for all involved – no matter who they are or what the power dynamic is. The proper harnessing of power is achieved by controlling and presenting ourselves via intentional verbal and non-verbal responses to make the most of potential influence in every situation.
Adam: What are your three best tips applicable to entrepreneurs, executives and civic leaders?
Gail:
Recognize that power is choice
Understand both sides of the power coin
Shift from a habitual reaction to a thoughtful response
The issue at hand often never gets addressed or resolved due to leaders employing the wrong kind of power. If we look at the world's great leaders, Angela Merkel, Winston Churchill, Martin Luther King, and RGB, they got things done by Powering Down and empowering others.
Adam: What is your best advice on building, leading and managing teams?
Gail: Inclusivity is the key. Many leaders focus on diversity, but I can tell you as a woman, there were many times I was at the table but was invisible. Teams thrive and excel on every member feeling valued and appreciated. Without creating an authentic environment where every person feels welcome, seen, and accepted for their uniqueness, we are unable to bring our best selves to any group or organization.
Forbes reported that inclusive teams make better decisions up to 87% of the time, and make them twice as fast with half the number of meetings. These teams also deliver 60% better results. Effective decision-making is 95% correlated with financial performance, according to Bain & Co.
Success at its very core relies on the effective and ethical use of power dynamics. The ability to harness that mysterious energy that ebbs and flows in every interaction is what creates a culture of mutual empowerment.
Adam: What is the single best piece of advice you have ever received?
Gail: Acknowledge your mistakes, learn the lesson, make the necessary corrections – then move on.
Adam Mendler is the CEO of The Veloz Group, where he co-founded and oversees ventures across a wide variety of industries. Adam is also the creator and host of the business and leadership podcast Thirty Minute Mentors, where he goes one on one with America's most successful people - Fortune 500 CEOs, founders of household name companies, Hall of Fame and Olympic gold medal winning athletes, political and military leaders - for intimate half-hour conversations each week. Adam has written extensively on leadership, management, entrepreneurship, marketing and sales, having authored over 70 articles published in major media outlets including Forbes, Inc. and HuffPost, and has conducted more than 500 one on one interviews with America’s top leaders through his collective media projects. A top leadership speaker, Adam draws upon his insights building and leading businesses and interviewing hundreds of America's top leaders as a top keynote speaker to businesses, universities and non-profit organizations.
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